Hello Anon, DOUBLE EXCLAMATION MARKS, so this indicates you are young and American and SALES. I am right so far? YES BUT
NO MONEY If you have done Research and are not just a random salesgirl, in both senses of the words, then you’ll know I have a ton of stuff. 33 years Writing, with 20 years of EARS, before that. No, I’m not 100, though on pain days I look like Death Warmed Up. Yes, I’ve really had a Quadruple Heart Bypass now just over 6 years ago. With the bonus of a “breast” now poking through my bypass scar, it’s a hernia, 1% of bypass patients get them So, I’m truly blessed, with Arthur my Arthritis for company. Not to mention Kidneys that should be cooked with beans and lentils, whatever lentils are. Topped off with a side order of 3 years of Tinnitus. Tinnitus is not a Roman slave by the way. So, I have a sea shore in my head 24/7 and it gets louder at night This means I have Taylor Swift, Mylie Cyrus, Will Young and even a whole host of Soft Rock in my bed every night, I’m SOOOO promiscuous . Their singing distracts me from Tinnitus, who is a noisy bugger, not literally. Bet you wish you didn’t bother sending me a circular, though emails are linear. BUT YES If you find me an Angel Investor This is what could be done Use my words to help teach English as a 2nd language, so 1/2 or USA for starters. Because my Stories are Funny, and if you have done your research, 80 Countries read my rubbish And on some days my book The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker is read in TEN languages on the same day So, my Words work everywhere, unlike Wordsworth, who is dead Enough Said It would be a Partnership, and I’d take my share I have NO money, I do have two teenage daughters, so obviously I have no money And one statistic, the average survival rate after Quadruple Heart Bypass, is 11 years So, if I’m average, maybe 5 more years Though as you read this, I hope you think he’s far from average, a real SOB, but far from average So, there you go, as Jon the Hippy used to say, if you reply I’ll tell you who he is. SO, in conclusion, and So is one of my favourite words, as well as a Peter Gabrial album If you can find an Angel Investor, and not just a jester, though the Jester was a gay bar in Birmingham Straight or Gay or Any which way, I’m happy with anybody, so long as they buy me a pint of Stella Artois Then if your Angel Investor, or even your rich dad, am I right again, anyway If they want to invest in Me, then please do reply. Otherwise, you can print and laminate this and put it in the gents’ toilet by the urinals I know you’re a lady, so get the janitor to do it. Then google me again, for you can find 208 stories read by me. As well as 2000 plus online, or 20 books in the car park of Amazon books Just look for the really stupid photos, and if you are angry by now, then, that’s what you are saying Perhaps I should put this email online? Why waste material That’s why Bernie had such silly mittens Kittens rhythms next, so maybe I’ll add a photo of my cat Totoro I told my daughters they could have a dog if I died of a cat if I had a heart attack A few weeks later I had an UNPLANNED Quadruple Heart Bypass Ok, that’s enough, you may be thinking what drugs am I on. Just heart meds and pain killers, but not opioids because of my weak kidneys The rest is PURE IMAGINATION Well maybe not so pure, but Imagination I’m attaching 2 books as a punishment Bet you wish you did your homework And your nights cold in Canada? Maybe John Denver is your boyfriend…
Confused or Smiling Michael Casey p.s I just got out of bed, Totoro drinks Comfort instead of Milk, hence so white and fluffy
I've updated this 18th March 2022
I'm Michael Casey from Birmingham England, the fat silver haired writer in shades.
Beware of Others with the EXACT SAME NAME, they are not me, and would not want to be me ...
use Google UK to find me, otherwise Posh Americans pop up
I've done loads of writing, about 2,000,000 Words worth over 34years now
But before I started to write, I LISTENED to BBC Radio 4 for 20 years,
from the age of 10 or younger
Frank Brown our lodger, went back to County Tyrone and he gifted us his Bush Radio.
He'd be nearly 100 now if he is still alive, so say a prayer for him
54 years in love with words, and I still look so dashing.
I have a picture in the attic, just like Dorian Gray
I've also had an interest in Politics for 54 years
with my dad heckling the tv and Politicians.
I almost immediately had a hit, a play called Shoplife was accepted but not finally
produced by a Theatre.
The Kenneth More Theatre, so thank them for sparing you all. This was back in 1989 yes, 30 years plus ago, the play was written in 1988. So since then I'm more than good enough, as a writer. Anything else.....
I also ignore those who just cannot write, pick your own candidate
I tend to write Comedy as I'd rather make you laugh than cry
I have written over 2000 short pieces of writing, yes 2000
" (c) by Michael Casey"
If you include "chats" 3700 samples, all told,
the chats do NOT go into my books when I compile them.
My first book ,a full length comedy/drama is The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker
You can read translations of it here on this site
Up to 20 different languages/translations have been read on the same day
via this site, here on Wordpress look fo Translations Galore page, and more
And in over 90 Countries world wide too
so you have no excuse, find your own language
and read
The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker
or Quick Stories or any other of the books in Translation on my Wordpress
This proves to me that the humour does travel
I have readers in over 100 countries now, just to repeat myself
From Nepal to American Samoa and all places North South East and West
Or its just a hit man on the run,
or whatever Unknown Region Means
It may also mean that only non English Speakers like my stuff
Coverage but lacking penetration as marketing folks might say
I did get 21,000 readers in 3 weeks for the Polish version of In Search of an Indian Princess.
which is basically the final 3 chapters of The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker
all by word of mouth. And 50,000 plus in Christmas week 2021
If you add up all the downloads from my Wordpress + 13,000 when somebody stole the file.
I have had more copies than Boris Johnson's Churchill book distributed.
Maybe 40,000 copies .
Not made a penny from it, free downloads in multiple languages.
Reverse Logic, if the world knows me, eventually somebody will pay me
But in reality I'll be dead first, and then just 2 pennies to pay the ferryman is enough
I've cut the Plaudits, you can read/decide for yourself
As for my life, I was born in the shadow of a Brewery,
I was a computer operator for a market research company into alcohol sales,
21 years altogether, StatsMR
Call centre guy, like everybody once in their life
I was also a Trainee Betting Shop Manager
I was a concierge and 10 other roles at Crowne Plaza NEC Birmingham for 3 years.
Spent 3 years at Pinsent Masons Law firm in Birmingham
I even hid a copy of my comic novel "BBU" in the Law Library at Pinsent Masons, well just for a day..
I did a few other jobs too, working life in reverse so to speak
and I was an Esol English teacher in an Islamic school, for a year, I knew I could teach.
I got Excellent, Excellent and Exemplary on the external assessment, yes really
And I asked them to pray for me at least once a day
beside which I've had a Shanghai connection for 20 years now, including 2 bilingual daughters
and being a hausfrau a long time too, I'm a great dad, as I've had lots of time with my daughters
I can always make somebody talk or laugh
I believe my short stories could be used to teach English, just package them up correctly
or App them
Or a Tale a Day from Michael, a story telling App
What else, I was brawn and brains, I used to be as strong as an Ox, now I just smell like one
We have a cat called Totoro, my daughters wanted a pet I said they could have a dog if I died , or a cat if I had a heart attack. A few weeks after that in Jan 2015 I had an Unplanned Quadruple Heart Bypass , it was supposed to be a triple but it ended up a Quadruple, 33% extra free so to speak. Now with an add on Hernia, the size of your fist, pushing through my bypass scar, it hurts when I laugh, so don't make me laugh
I also have arthritis and other hindrances that hobble my body and give me pain galore.
But my mind is free, though having read my stories you may wish I didn't bother
But I'll ignore you, and carry on regardless. I do get heckled by my own Tinnitus these past
3 years+, so I have music on all night long to drown it out.
I sleep with Miley, Taylor, Eric Clapton and Will Young,
maybe I should buy a bigger bed, or just get a better mattress.
Tinnitus is a curse, just trust me I know, each day I wake up,
Tinnitus SCREAMS at me for a full hour till it calms down
That's the end of the tidy version of my life
To finish here's the list of my 20 books, so far:-
1.The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker
2.Shoplife
3.Essays and Plays
4.Blogs 2011
5.300 and Not OUT
6.Shorts 2013
7.More Shorts 2014
8.Quick Stories
9.Still Alive 2015
10.Undiscovered Words 2016
11.Still Smiling 2017
12.Altogether Now
13.New Horizons
14.14 Up
15.15 Down
16.Sweet Sixteen
17. 17 Again
18. 18 New Views
19. The Final Cut of the 19th Hole
20. 2020 Words
21. 21 Door Keys, key to the door 21 on Bingo, hence title,
53,000 words so far
I write bullet point stuff mainly now as Tinnitus stops me from
getting in the zone to write, story stories. (c) by Michael Casey stuff
though my bullet points are better than some "writers" discuss, miaow.
That's why I dream of a speed typist, so I could dictate from the sofa
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Michael-Casey/e/B00571G0YC to buy ebooks
Loads of Korean and Arabic translations downloaded from my Wordpress, 1000s of them
Quick Stories in Korean is a big hit. Maybe Kim in North Korea should read my books, instead of wasting his countries resources on what? Just keeping one person in power, him? Instead of joining the real world and opening a string on golf courses. That way we could get rid of Trump too. Into the sunset, as they play golf.
Tears for a Butcher will be the sequel to BBU, and it too will be 600pages,
however I really need
a speed typist to put it down, while I sit and dictate like Barbara Cartland, and hopefully my speed typist would be impressed. we'd marry have half Korean kids, and form a Kpop band with our 4 new kids, with me as manager.
And yes this is more for my bucket list, as Tinnitus keeps me awake too much, 6 months of not sleeping till dawn is really killing me
Michael Casey
aka the fat silver haired writer in shades from Birmingham England
https://2.gravatar.com/avatar/efda2dca0de5b9269191b7c8b0102473?s=400&d=mm
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