The Rubbish you send me

The RUBBISH you send me (c)

by Michael Casey

Well I had a spate of google docs

I had saw your profile I want a man like you

Here’s a photo

Some card must have put my email down somewhere

But I only look East, Far East

So they are wasting their time

And they should just STOP

and they have now,  as I’ve deleted 100s UNREAD

I also get lots of discount stuff

my email is .COM

but I’m in England not USA

so I don’t need Target, whatever that is

Microsoft reads your emails

so then you are targeted for stuff

Tinnitus cures and Pain relief

And YOU ARE CHOSEN

I’m not a Jew, so don’t say I’m a Chosen One

Chosen for a Scam by somebody in a Bikini

Living the high life from where they screw everybody

Amazon automated phone calls, but I’m not even on Amazon

Amazon and DHL fake emails too

They just stink like YOU

Fake this, fake that

And some companies NEVER use email

It costs money for a mail shot

So Scammers never do that

When you top-up on your phone

They harvest your phone number

So you get all manner of stuff

Today right now, fake Turkey/Syria charities

This is beyond evil

And on it goes

HELLO WHO ARE YOU WHAT DO YOU WANT

AS AGRESSIVELY AS I CAN

The Vicar was shocked but he’s used to me by now

so HE swears at me in Latin

GO Ablative Absolute YOURSELF

and yes I’m mangling everything here

To Confuse Scammers if the read this

That’s if they can read ENGLISH

The Ablative Absolute is what we did in 2F in the corner room

back in 1972 maybe, Mr Proctor WE still hate you

I hour lesson, we sweated, break, continue 2nd 1hour lesson

Only then did HE explain it to us

I think Prasat had an inclinling, he’s s Doctor now

One of the 4 who became doctors

Yes, a clever clogs class, and UB40 guy he was in 1B with me

But he did not make it into the fast stream, 2F and LATIN

He became a Musician, whatever happened to him

Maybe too much Red Red Wine

Foster was a vicars son, he was very clever

another his dad was a Prison Officer

But I digress, no doubt I’ll get offers of Protective Clothing Now

And stun guns from USA

And Bibles for Everybody

With a cheap riffle on the side

Very Trumpian, Firing Squads

I’d fire all the Politicians in the GOP, as in sack not attack

and now it’s time for Pain Killer, Hemp oil , which is legal

and made in the UK, a cream that takes my pain away

otherwise I’m bent double with pain

So as I’ve mentioned that Gummies, will be  advertised to me

They are dangerous by the way

I’m an expert on pain after all, 10 years of it

But do you give a monkeys 

So  long as you can send me marketing

Its just as bad the glossy leaflets through the letter box

Pizza galore

Well I’m waiting for the pain killer to kick in

Then when I’m done with you

Better Call Saul conclusion

Howard has just been shot in the head, dead

So I have to continue with that

I was shocked too

BUT I would say watch all of Better Call Saul

I do wonder why Howard was persecuted so much

But the acting is great, quality stuff

I will get back to my Korean via a Japanese horror film

And still daily as soon as I put something online

France reads it

Korea reads it

If only the Korean could type for me…

But it’s probably a USA service man

who stumbled over me

I used to get Portugal straight away too

so who those three are/were I’ll never know

So now I’ll get fake Emails with emails .kor, or Fr or PT

Pretending to like me

I get so much rubbish I need a shovel

To clean the stables

and on it goes

In the night when I cannot sleep I may send

yet another email to Moscow

Holy Pictures and an admonition

If only I change one mind

Then PUTIN’s evil is lessened

and yes I’ve bored you all this past year

And not written as much comedy

But it’s hard to smile 

while there is Genocide in Ukraine

I do believe in what Mary said in Fatima in 1917

So I’ll end now, and just ask fellow sinners

to Pray for Peace in Ukraine

which is Russia surrendering to Jesus through Mary

15 Feb 2023

Published by michaelgcasey

I've updated this 18th March 2022 I'm Michael Casey from Birmingham England, the fat silver haired writer in shades. Beware of Others with the EXACT SAME NAME, they are not me, and would not want to be me ... use Google UK to find me, otherwise Posh Americans pop up I've done loads of writing, about 2,000,000 Words worth over 34years now But before I started to write, I LISTENED to BBC Radio 4 for 20 years, from the age of 10 or younger Frank Brown our lodger, went back to County Tyrone and he gifted us his Bush Radio. He'd be nearly 100 now if he is still alive, so say a prayer for him 54 years in love with words, and I still look so dashing. I have a picture in the attic, just like Dorian Gray I've also had an interest in Politics for 54 years with my dad heckling the tv and Politicians. I almost immediately had a hit, a play called Shoplife was accepted but not finally produced by a Theatre. The Kenneth More Theatre, so thank them for sparing you all. This was back in 1989 yes, 30 years plus ago, the play was written in 1988. So since then I'm more than good enough, as a writer. Anything else..... I also ignore those who just cannot write, pick your own candidate I tend to write Comedy as I'd rather make you laugh than cry I have written over 2000 short pieces of writing, yes 2000 " (c) by Michael Casey" If you include "chats" 3700 samples, all told, the chats do NOT go into my books when I compile them. My first book ,a full length comedy/drama is The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker You can read translations of it here on this site Up to 20 different languages/translations have been read on the same day via this site, here on Wordpress look fo Translations Galore page, and more And in over 90 Countries world wide too so you have no excuse, find your own language and read The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker or Quick Stories or any other of the books in Translation on my Wordpress This proves to me that the humour does travel I have readers in over 100 countries now, just to repeat myself From Nepal to American Samoa and all places North South East and West Or its just a hit man on the run, or whatever Unknown Region Means It may also mean that only non English Speakers like my stuff Coverage but lacking penetration as marketing folks might say I did get 21,000 readers in 3 weeks for the Polish version of In Search of an Indian Princess. which is basically the final 3 chapters of The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker all by word of mouth. And 50,000 plus in Christmas week 2021 If you add up all the downloads from my Wordpress + 13,000 when somebody stole the file. I have had more copies than Boris Johnson's Churchill book distributed. Maybe 40,000 copies . Not made a penny from it, free downloads in multiple languages. Reverse Logic, if the world knows me, eventually somebody will pay me But in reality I'll be dead first, and then just 2 pennies to pay the ferryman is enough I've cut the Plaudits, you can read/decide for yourself As for my life, I was born in the shadow of a Brewery, I was a computer operator for a market research company into alcohol sales, 21 years altogether, StatsMR Call centre guy, like everybody once in their life I was also a Trainee Betting Shop Manager I was a concierge and 10 other roles at Crowne Plaza NEC Birmingham for 3 years. Spent 3 years at Pinsent Masons Law firm in Birmingham I even hid a copy of my comic novel "BBU" in the Law Library at Pinsent Masons, well just for a day.. I did a few other jobs too, working life in reverse so to speak and I was an Esol English teacher in an Islamic school, for a year, I knew I could teach. I got Excellent, Excellent and Exemplary on the external assessment, yes really And I asked them to pray for me at least once a day beside which I've had a Shanghai connection for 20 years now, including 2 bilingual daughters and being a hausfrau a long time too, I'm a great dad, as I've had lots of time with my daughters I can always make somebody talk or laugh I believe my short stories could be used to teach English, just package them up correctly or App them Or a Tale a Day from Michael, a story telling App What else, I was brawn and brains, I used to be as strong as an Ox, now I just smell like one We have a cat called Totoro, my daughters wanted a pet I said they could have a dog if I died , or a cat if I had a heart attack. A few weeks after that in Jan 2015 I had an Unplanned Quadruple Heart Bypass , it was supposed to be a triple but it ended up a Quadruple, 33% extra free so to speak. Now with an add on Hernia, the size of your fist, pushing through my bypass scar, it hurts when I laugh, so don't make me laugh I also have arthritis and other hindrances that hobble my body and give me pain galore. But my mind is free, though having read my stories you may wish I didn't bother But I'll ignore you, and carry on regardless. I do get heckled by my own Tinnitus these past 3 years+, so I have music on all night long to drown it out. I sleep with Miley, Taylor, Eric Clapton and Will Young, maybe I should buy a bigger bed, or just get a better mattress. Tinnitus is a curse, just trust me I know, each day I wake up, Tinnitus SCREAMS at me for a full hour till it calms down That's the end of the tidy version of my life To finish here's the list of my 20 books, so far:- 1.The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker 2.Shoplife 3.Essays and Plays 4.Blogs 2011 5.300 and Not OUT 6.Shorts 2013 7.More Shorts 2014 8.Quick Stories 9.Still Alive 2015 10.Undiscovered Words 2016 11.Still Smiling 2017 12.Altogether Now 13.New Horizons 14.14 Up 15.15 Down 16.Sweet Sixteen 17. 17 Again 18. 18 New Views 19. The Final Cut of the 19th Hole 20. 2020 Words 21. 21 Door Keys, key to the door 21 on Bingo, hence title, 53,000 words so far I write bullet point stuff mainly now as Tinnitus stops me from getting in the zone to write, story stories. (c) by Michael Casey stuff though my bullet points are better than some "writers" discuss, miaow. That's why I dream of a speed typist, so I could dictate from the sofa https://www.amazon.co.uk/Michael-Casey/e/B00571G0YC to buy ebooks Loads of Korean and Arabic translations downloaded from my Wordpress, 1000s of them Quick Stories in Korean is a big hit. Maybe Kim in North Korea should read my books, instead of wasting his countries resources on what? Just keeping one person in power, him? Instead of joining the real world and opening a string on golf courses. That way we could get rid of Trump too. Into the sunset, as they play golf. Tears for a Butcher will be the sequel to BBU, and it too will be 600pages, however I really need a speed typist to put it down, while I sit and dictate like Barbara Cartland, and hopefully my speed typist would be impressed. we'd marry have half Korean kids, and form a Kpop band with our 4 new kids, with me as manager. And yes this is more for my bucket list, as Tinnitus keeps me awake too much, 6 months of not sleeping till dawn is really killing me Michael Casey aka the fat silver haired writer in shades from Birmingham England https://2.gravatar.com/avatar/efda2dca0de5b9269191b7c8b0102473?s=400&d=mm