Too Good To Be True

Too Good To Be True©

By

Michael Casey

 

Well events happen and after you say, “it was too good to be true” and so it is. If something appears too good to be true then it probably is. You pray to Saint Jude for something and you get a quick answer, only it’s the wrong answer. Ok, you prayed for a job any job will do, and BINGO you get one, working down the Mortuary. Saint Jude did his part, now you must do yours wheeling the dead away.

 

I heard half a story that somebody I used to work with ended up with that kind of job, maybe I misheard Paul Godshill, if I remembered his name right, I even think we now live in the same street. He’ll be hiding behind his curtains now, not CASEY. His brother was a picture hanger, a professional picture hanger. Millionaires who have a nice collection would get him to hang them so they look nice. No going down Woolworths for sticky back hangers, but proper hangings by a Godshill. I think in the end the Picture Hangerer gave up the job as somebody was trying to teach him to suck eggs, or rather cut cloth.

 

So things are going along swimmingly, you have a great job which you enjoy then it ends. Things really were too good to be true. He’s probably an internationally famous best selling writer now, he’s far far cleverer than I’ll ever be.Though he’d never tell me his pen name. If you want to appear smart, just hang out with clever people, then nobody will notice you are a dullard. Or pretend to be a dullard then you can pounce afterwards, and bite their bum, and I bite bums if people annoy me. Or as Laura once said, “he does bit too”.

 

Life does toss in curve balls, which sounds like a disease Sports Men get, but you have to go with the flow, as somebody said to me, he later became a vagrant when his life spiraled downwards. Yes life can be too good to be true. So make sure you save for a rainy day, and marry a good woman. Women are the bedrock of society, they get on with it while their useless men flounder. It’s a woman’s prayers that keep a family going.

 

We all can come a cropper, you waste a day on an Interview Process, and by the coffee machine say something that is taken out of context, and you lose the chance of a job. And you did not get paid a penny for the process. That’s one way you can get knackered. Or you apply for a job and they ask you “what is the least you will work for”, yes I actually had that question, and you are desperate for a job,so you put a lower figure and lose £1000 a year, equal to a month’s salary back then. Perhaps I should name and shame the company, and yes it did turn out to be the worst one I ever worked for. Ringing up every day when you are sick with food poisoning badgering you as to when you  will return.

 

Life is not fair, don’t think it ever will be, things are too good to be true, if you make a few good friends along the way then that’s the best you can hope for. Yes you can have a guilded life, but then behind the mask, behind the facarde reality is unseen. You may be coughing up blood for months but people don’t know and wouldn’t even care, yes I’m harking back to that bad company. Luckily I was only there a year, I promised myself I’d leave after our trip to USA, so I did.

 

All in all, into each Life some rain must Fall, but we all need to have a defence mechanism, of love, of hope, of friends. Failing that 17 pints of Stella Artois and a packet of Walkers Cheese and Onion crisps.

Published by michaelgcasey

I've updated this 18th March 2022 I'm Michael Casey from Birmingham England, the fat silver haired writer in shades. Beware of Others with the EXACT SAME NAME, they are not me, and would not want to be me ... use Google UK to find me, otherwise Posh Americans pop up I've done loads of writing, about 2,000,000 Words worth over 34years now But before I started to write, I LISTENED to BBC Radio 4 for 20 years, from the age of 10 or younger Frank Brown our lodger, went back to County Tyrone and he gifted us his Bush Radio. He'd be nearly 100 now if he is still alive, so say a prayer for him 54 years in love with words, and I still look so dashing. I have a picture in the attic, just like Dorian Gray I've also had an interest in Politics for 54 years with my dad heckling the tv and Politicians. I almost immediately had a hit, a play called Shoplife was accepted but not finally produced by a Theatre. The Kenneth More Theatre, so thank them for sparing you all. This was back in 1989 yes, 30 years plus ago, the play was written in 1988. So since then I'm more than good enough, as a writer. Anything else..... I also ignore those who just cannot write, pick your own candidate I tend to write Comedy as I'd rather make you laugh than cry I have written over 2000 short pieces of writing, yes 2000 " (c) by Michael Casey" If you include "chats" 3700 samples, all told, the chats do NOT go into my books when I compile them. My first book ,a full length comedy/drama is The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker You can read translations of it here on this site Up to 20 different languages/translations have been read on the same day via this site, here on Wordpress look fo Translations Galore page, and more And in over 90 Countries world wide too so you have no excuse, find your own language and read The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker or Quick Stories or any other of the books in Translation on my Wordpress This proves to me that the humour does travel I have readers in over 100 countries now, just to repeat myself From Nepal to American Samoa and all places North South East and West Or its just a hit man on the run, or whatever Unknown Region Means It may also mean that only non English Speakers like my stuff Coverage but lacking penetration as marketing folks might say I did get 21,000 readers in 3 weeks for the Polish version of In Search of an Indian Princess. which is basically the final 3 chapters of The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker all by word of mouth. And 50,000 plus in Christmas week 2021 If you add up all the downloads from my Wordpress + 13,000 when somebody stole the file. I have had more copies than Boris Johnson's Churchill book distributed. Maybe 40,000 copies . Not made a penny from it, free downloads in multiple languages. Reverse Logic, if the world knows me, eventually somebody will pay me But in reality I'll be dead first, and then just 2 pennies to pay the ferryman is enough I've cut the Plaudits, you can read/decide for yourself As for my life, I was born in the shadow of a Brewery, I was a computer operator for a market research company into alcohol sales, 21 years altogether, StatsMR Call centre guy, like everybody once in their life I was also a Trainee Betting Shop Manager I was a concierge and 10 other roles at Crowne Plaza NEC Birmingham for 3 years. Spent 3 years at Pinsent Masons Law firm in Birmingham I even hid a copy of my comic novel "BBU" in the Law Library at Pinsent Masons, well just for a day.. I did a few other jobs too, working life in reverse so to speak and I was an Esol English teacher in an Islamic school, for a year, I knew I could teach. I got Excellent, Excellent and Exemplary on the external assessment, yes really And I asked them to pray for me at least once a day beside which I've had a Shanghai connection for 20 years now, including 2 bilingual daughters and being a hausfrau a long time too, I'm a great dad, as I've had lots of time with my daughters I can always make somebody talk or laugh I believe my short stories could be used to teach English, just package them up correctly or App them Or a Tale a Day from Michael, a story telling App What else, I was brawn and brains, I used to be as strong as an Ox, now I just smell like one We have a cat called Totoro, my daughters wanted a pet I said they could have a dog if I died , or a cat if I had a heart attack. A few weeks after that in Jan 2015 I had an Unplanned Quadruple Heart Bypass , it was supposed to be a triple but it ended up a Quadruple, 33% extra free so to speak. Now with an add on Hernia, the size of your fist, pushing through my bypass scar, it hurts when I laugh, so don't make me laugh I also have arthritis and other hindrances that hobble my body and give me pain galore. But my mind is free, though having read my stories you may wish I didn't bother But I'll ignore you, and carry on regardless. I do get heckled by my own Tinnitus these past 3 years+, so I have music on all night long to drown it out. I sleep with Miley, Taylor, Eric Clapton and Will Young, maybe I should buy a bigger bed, or just get a better mattress. Tinnitus is a curse, just trust me I know, each day I wake up, Tinnitus SCREAMS at me for a full hour till it calms down That's the end of the tidy version of my life To finish here's the list of my 20 books, so far:- 1.The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker 2.Shoplife 3.Essays and Plays 4.Blogs 2011 5.300 and Not OUT 6.Shorts 2013 7.More Shorts 2014 8.Quick Stories 9.Still Alive 2015 10.Undiscovered Words 2016 11.Still Smiling 2017 12.Altogether Now 13.New Horizons 14.14 Up 15.15 Down 16.Sweet Sixteen 17. 17 Again 18. 18 New Views 19. The Final Cut of the 19th Hole 20. 2020 Words 21. 21 Door Keys, key to the door 21 on Bingo, hence title, 53,000 words so far I write bullet point stuff mainly now as Tinnitus stops me from getting in the zone to write, story stories. (c) by Michael Casey stuff though my bullet points are better than some "writers" discuss, miaow. That's why I dream of a speed typist, so I could dictate from the sofa https://www.amazon.co.uk/Michael-Casey/e/B00571G0YC to buy ebooks Loads of Korean and Arabic translations downloaded from my Wordpress, 1000s of them Quick Stories in Korean is a big hit. Maybe Kim in North Korea should read my books, instead of wasting his countries resources on what? Just keeping one person in power, him? Instead of joining the real world and opening a string on golf courses. That way we could get rid of Trump too. Into the sunset, as they play golf. Tears for a Butcher will be the sequel to BBU, and it too will be 600pages, however I really need a speed typist to put it down, while I sit and dictate like Barbara Cartland, and hopefully my speed typist would be impressed. we'd marry have half Korean kids, and form a Kpop band with our 4 new kids, with me as manager. And yes this is more for my bucket list, as Tinnitus keeps me awake too much, 6 months of not sleeping till dawn is really killing me Michael Casey aka the fat silver haired writer in shades from Birmingham England https://2.gravatar.com/avatar/efda2dca0de5b9269191b7c8b0102473?s=400&d=mm

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